“Never be bullied into silence. Never allow yourself to be made a victim. Accept no one’s definition of your life; define yourself.” ~Harvey Fierstein
Today I read an article on gawker about how the Canadian National Post ran a full page ad today condemning Canada’s policy on equal rights education.
So…read this first.
(It should be noted that I don’t quite agree with everything that guy wrote, because he seems kind of whiny and judgmental, but I agree with the basic point.)
Truth is, I don’t know a whole lot about this, because even though I can see Canada from my roof, it doesn’t mean I’m brushed up on their educational policies (do you hear me, Sarah Palin? It’s not always location, location, location.)
I always had it in my head that the Canada was like our liberal cousin, what with the healthcare and the gay marriage and the fries covered in cheese and gravy. I’ll admit that I don’t know much more about it, outside of Niagara Falls and Clifton Hill. But I was definitely surprised that a national paper would run this ad.
I am a big supporter of gay rights, and I’ll tell you why. Ten years ago last Friday, the love of my high school life came out to me. Everyone told me he was gay, and looking back that was unbelievably clear considering that we met through a theater group and after my senior prom he walked around singing show tunes for an hour. Still, I was shocked. His coming out ended up being the straw that broke this camels back, and I ended up dropping out of school and going into therapy for a variety of reasons (not solely him, mind you.) But when this happened, I did what I always do in times of trouble. I researched the hell out of it.
After this, I realized that many people I knew were gay…after all, I worked in theater. This didn’t bother me because I knew what “gay” was when I was 9. When most people get a sex talk from their mother, my mother sat me down and explained that dad’s two best friends were homos. Also not surprising, as he worked in theater, too. Then a few years later I found out that my aunt was gay, and by this point it was like “so what?” I didn’t care who anyone loved. I loved some total losers in my lifetime, but no one ever said I was going to hell for it. I know that I wouldn’t be able to handle the idea of homosexuality as an adult had I not been exposed to it earlier in life. On that same thread, I would like to note that having been exposed to it when I was young did not, in fact, make me gay. And to tell the truth, I don’t think anyone would care if I was (except perhaps my boyfriend.) But that’s the world I grew up in, and not the world others have. So I understand the fear, or the confusion, and even the blind hatred of others. I don’t like it, and I don’t agree with it, but I understand it.
Now, this ad wasn’t just about the education policy about gays, it’s also about the transgendered. Essentially, they are trying to teach the kids that it’s ok if you are a boy who wants to be a girl. Which I think is delightful. And again, I will tell you why.
I have a friend who went to college a girl, and graduated a guy. I don’t know much about her personal struggle with gender identity, but I’m pretty sure it totally sucked, and she would have like a teacher explaining it to her.
My question is this. What do people think is the worst that will happen?
Clearly, gay does not beget gay, because it’s not like all the gay people in the world were born from gay parents. So the world is not going to come to a grinding halt because all us heteros are going to be wiped out. Also, there’s plenty of ways to make a baby that don’t involve intercourse, as evidenced by my cousin Grace, aka the best damn kid I know (apologies to all kids at work and my boyfriends children. But seriously. If you met her, you’d totally agree.) Also, it’s very clear that we define our sexuality early. If I knew in 3rd grade that the boy sitting across from me was cute, then that same boy probably knew the boy next to him was, as well. So every time I see people saying that this isn’t an issue for children, I scoff. Of course it is. We learn about relationships before we learn about anything else…our relationship with parents, their relationships with each other.
And what really bugs me about this ad is the line “I’m a girl, don’t teach me to question if I’m a boy.” Um, hello…no one is trying to do that. You’re a girl. You know that. You own it. You want to be it. Good for you. The point is that there are some girls out there that ALREADY KNOW they would rather be a boy. So why can’t you just take away the whole “love one another” part of the lesson and leave it at that?
I hope that the US teaches LGBTQ equal rights in the future. I think it would be beneficial, much in the way that I think it’s important to learn about the civil rights movement.
But then, I believe a person should be judged by their actions, not their genetics. And, unfortunately, it will probably always startle me how many people don’t think the same way.
